Thursday, April 3, 2008

Owl Pellets

Dear Mr You-Know-Who,
Your self indulgent pouting, and me -against-all-the-mean,mean-girls-of-the-world attitude is getting you nowhere with me. If all girls suck, maybe the problem lies within yourself, and you need to take a deep, introspective look, and question "what could I be doing wrong here?" and "How could I change my approach to be more appealing?" I'm not asking that you not "be yourself" by all means be who you are. But if who you are is a needy, insecure little boy, then you cannot fault me for maintaining a healthy distance. The only thing you can blame me for is being too hopeful in the beginning, that you would work out for me. But it's not right, so for that, I am sorry I was wrong.

I'm not trying to be a user, or to lead anybody on. I'm subtly searching for someone with quality attributes. Not even searching really. Just investigating any promising lead that falls in my lap as I go along, trying to live and enjoy life. I suppose I approach dating somewhat like a child scientist excavating a pile of little owl pellets. (big former science club nerd? guilty.) I am picking them up one by one, digging through them trying to pick apart the stuff I want from the stuff I don't want... the regurgitated fur and whiny attitudes. What I want is the pellet with the delicate little rodent skull, complete with incisors and buggy little eyesockets, not the lame pellet full of barbie tic-tac toe bones like and a femur like a plastic toothpick. Odd analogy, yes. But, to myself at least, it makes sense.

1 comment:

Sassy P. said...

I'm thinking that the dear Mr. You know who letter is kinda the most ingenious thing I have ever read. And I don't really actually know that I spelled ingenious correctly, but you get the point. I was also admiring how vastly different my, your, and Jen's writing style is. I love it!